Spent $2,200 on a marketing agency retainer in 2019, got 3 leads and a pizza party invite
Back in 2019 I ran a small gym in Sacramento and hired a digital agency for a six month retainer at about $2,200 a month. They promised local SEO, Google Ads, and social content. What I got was a monthly report full of charts, three real leads, and an invite to their holiday pizza party. The kicker was the "content" they made: stock photos of people lifting weights who clearly had never touched a barbell. When I asked to see the ad account I found out they had been running ads to a landing page with a broken contact form for five weeks. I still wonder if I just picked the wrong agency or if that whole retainer model is set up to fail for small shops like mine.
My buddy ran a crossfit box over in Roseville and went through almost the exact same thing with a different agency. They kept sending him these fancy dashboards every month but the phone never rang, then he found out they were boosting posts to an audience in a totally different state. Turns out the guy running his account was also handling like 40 other clients and probably never even opened the ad manager. He ended up killing the retainer after four months and just posting his own videos from his phone, which honestly did better than anything the agency made. So yeah, I don't think it's just you, sounds like the whole model is built for them to collect the check and hope you don't ask too many questions.