A quick chat at a Denver meetup changed how I see asking for help

I was at a startup event in Denver about six months ago, feeling pretty stuck on a marketing plan. I got talking to a woman who ran a small tech company, and she told me something simple. She said, 'I give myself 20 minutes to figure something out alone, then I just ask someone.' She showed me her phone with a list of five people she could call for different problems. It made me start my own list, and now I reach out way faster instead of spinning my wheels. What's one thing you've been stuck on lately that you could ask your network about?

3 comments

3 Comments

thomas.cameron2mo ago

Totally get that feeling of thinking you should already know. I used to burn a whole day trying to fix a weird coding bug by myself. Now my rule is like 30 minutes, then I message my friend who's way better at it. Just last week I was stuck on this database thing, asked him, and he had it sorted in ten minutes. Felt dumb for not asking sooner.

ellis.ben2mo ago

Read a blog post once that called this the "15 minute rule." If you're stuck on a work problem for 15 minutes, you have to ask for help. It felt too short at first, but it stops me from wasting a whole afternoon going down a rabbit hole. My list is just three people right now, but it's made a huge difference. The hard part is fighting the feeling that I should already know the answer.

the_blair1mo ago

The 15 minute rule sounds good on paper but I have to wonder if it's just training people to give up too fast. @thomas.cameron's example of spending 30 minutes then getting help in ten actually proves the point - those extra 15 minutes of struggle are where you really learn your stuff. Sometimes the answer you need is just five more minutes of effort away.